How to encourage your toddler to stay in bed

As a parent of a toddler, one of the biggest challenges you may face at bedtime is getting them to stay in bed. Whether it's a fear of the dark, a need for extra attention, or simply the excitement of exploring, toddlers often seem to have an endless supply of energy when it's time for bed. But sleep is crucial for their growth, development, and overall well-being, so establishing healthy sleep habits is important for both you and your little one.

Here are some tips to help your toddler stay in bed!

1. Establish a Consistent Bedtime Routine

Toddlers thrive on routine, and knowing what to expect at bedtime can help ease their transition into sleep. A calming bedtime routine that includes activities like taking a warm bath, reading a book or singing a song can signal to your child that it's time to wind down. Consistency is key—try to follow the same steps each night, and stick to a regular bedtime.

2. Create the Optimum Sleep Environment

A toddler-friendly sleep environment can make a huge difference in encouraging your little one to stay in bed. Make sure the room is the right temperature, dark, and quiet (you can use white noise to block our any potential external noises). Consider adding a nightlight if your toddler tells you they are afraid of the dark, but keep it dim so it doesn't disrupt their ability to fall asleep. A favorite stuffed animal or blanket can also offer comfort and help them feel secure in their bed.

3. Set Clear Expectations

Before you tuck your toddler in, it's important to set clear and simple expectations about staying in bed. Let them know that once it's bedtime, they need to stay in their room until morning. You can reinforce this by explaining why sleep is important—whether it’s to grow big and strong or to have lots of energy for fun activities the next day.

4. Use Positive Reinforcement

Praise and reward your toddler for staying in bed. Some parents like to create a reward chart which offers a tempting incentive for toddlers. Another tip is to loudly praise your child (when they are in earshot) to another adult about how amazingly they did at staying in bed the night before. Your child will feel so proud of themselves and will want to do it again to get more praise.

5. Be Patient and Calm

It’s normal for toddlers to test boundaries, and your little one might get out of bed several times before they finally settle in for the night. When this happens, stay calm and gentle but firm. Avoid engaging in lengthy conversations or giving them too much attention, as this can encourage them to continue getting out of bed. Simply guide them back to bed with interactions kept to a minimum. It may take several nights or even a week or so of this consistent behaviour to make a difference, but stick to it!

6. Address Night-time Fears

Many toddlers experience night-time fears, such as a fear of the dark or monsters in their room. If this is the case for your child, address their fears and reassure them that they are safe. You can use a nightlight or a “monster spray” (a spray bottle with water) to help them feel secure. Something I did when my daughter told me she was scared of monsters coming into her room was to cut up a lime and put it in a bowl at the foot of her bed. I told her monsters hated the smell of limes and were scared of them so wouldn’t come into her room, and it really worked!

7. Give them access to water and take them to the loo before bedtime

If your toddler tends to get out of bed multiple times after being tucked in because they say they are thirsty or need the loo, leave a water bottle in bed with them that they help themselves to. Make sure they go to the toilet just before they are tucked in for bed.

8. Give Them Some Control

Sometimes toddlers resist bedtime simply because they want to feel in control. Letting them make small decisions—like choosing their pajamas, picking out a bedtime story, or deciding where to place their nightlight—can give them a sense of ownership over the bedtime routine. The more control they feel they have, the more likely they are to cooperate.

9. Be Consistent and Firm

It can be tempting to give in when your toddler begs for “just one more story” or insists on getting out of bed. However, consistency is essential for teaching them boundaries. Stick to your bedtime rules, and gently but firmly return them to their bed each time they get up. Over time, they will learn that staying in bed is the expectation, not the exception!